Living in a Fortress

(this post has been updated because it did not meet the quality assurance approval of Pavlichenko).

I have created a list of advantages and disadvantages to living in a fortress. I hope this list will guide those who have to decide in the future whether to live in a fortress. It is not for everyone, and this easy to use guide will help you make the decision.

Advantages:
People have lived there for hundreds of years. Can't be all bad.
Generally sited on high features to exploit terrain and dominate vital ground in a defensive position, the fortress offers breathtaking views of the surrounding landscape.
Tax collectors and collection agencies can't find you.
The fortress is very secure. Unless criminals figure out how to use grappling hooks, which clearly they won't.
The fortress consists of many dark alleys where all sorts of exciting things can happen.
You have a helipad. However, if you don't have access to a helicopter, this is irrelevant.
You can have a Sherman tank's barrel pointed directly at your apartment, just to keep you on your toes.
Repelling invasions by American barbarians with 19th century weapons and tactics would be quite easy.

Disadvantages:
You can no longer order ammunition for the cannons. Most people don't know how to operate them anyway.
Ordering pizza is quite an ordeal.
You can't "buzz" people in.
Not a single organization can put your address in their #&%$ database.
You live in a tourist attraction, which means that walking around naked in your room is a no-no.
Any damage you do is an act of heritage destruction.
Giving directions to your friends who are coming to visit is very difficult: Ok, when you enter the serpentine, turn right, then left, then left again... The thing was built to confuse people when they enter the place.
Most of the tunnels are no longer passable.

Anyone considering moving into a fortress should consider these factors and seek advice from fellow fortress dwellers.